17 Habits of the Self-Destructive Person (+ How to Stop) ⋆ LonerWolf
Turn toward the problem. One of the biggest problems with making life changes is that we tend to avoid thinking about the problem. It gets worse and worse, and yet we distract ourselves, because looking at the problem can be scary and painful. But this only makes the problem worse.
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If you want to get out of the cycle, you have to let yourself think about it. Look at the problem. Acknowledge it. Pick one small, distinct change.
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So pick one change, and be specific: eat one fruit at lunch each day. Drink unsweetened green tea instead of that Big Gulp of soda you have in the afternoon. Drink unsweetened coffee with a splash of creamer instead of a Starbucks grande latte with extra whipped cream. And so on.
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One change at a time, slowly. Commit big time. While you want your change to be small, you want your commitment to be huge. How can you commit big time? Join an accountability group. Publicly commit to a big embarrassing consequence if you fail. Make a pledge to someone you love. Put a big sum of money on it with your friends. Be all in.
Learn to believe that you can. In the beginning, you will probably have doubts that you can stick to this change. Stick to it for one small step drink a glass of water, eat one fruit , and see that you can do it. Then stick to it for another small step.
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Each time you do it, use this as evidence that you are capable. Use failure to learn. Use it as an opportunity to learn: learn about how you work best, about how habits work, about negative self-talk see next item and urges. Learn about obstacles, which are inevitable, and how to get around them. Each time you mess up, this is an amazing opportunity to get better, to improve your method. There will be thoughts in your head about not being able to do it, or wanting to quit.
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